Tag Archive | #bookgiveaway

(Video) What Brain Science Tells Us about Joy

What does brain science tell us about joy?
How can we trigger the circuitry in our brains so that our marriages are strengthened?

These are some of the questions that Chris Coursey answers during a fascinating conversation about his new book, co-authored with Marcus Warner: The 4 Habits of Joy-filled MarriagesChris shares many helpful insights and practical suggestions for increasing the joy in our marriages.

You will enjoy watching this interview!

You can learn more about this encouraging book HERE.

If you would like to enter the drawing for a free copy of this book, be sure to comment HERE or HERE by June 23.

God bless you as you build joy in your relationships!
Tami

Your Marriage has a Legacy

Forty-seven years of marriage can provide a wealth of knowledge and insight, especially when that marriage has been built on biblical principles. Drawing from that rich experience, Crawford and Karen Loritts have written a new book entitled, Your Marriage Today … And Tomorrow. The book emphasizes creating marriages that are so strong today that they give endurance to marriages tomorrow, in the next generation and beyond.

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Seeing the Big Picture

Your Marriage Today focuses on the underlying principles of a successful marriage. Crawford acknowledges that he is the “big picture” person in his marriage while his wife is better at the details. Although the book is co-authored by both Crawford and Karen, it is written in Crawford’s conversational voice, and the material reflects his “big picture” perspective.

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The instruction and insights which the Loritts share are excellent. Their advice is solidly biblical, full of wisdom, and honoring to both husbands and wives. I think readers will be encouraged to see how God has beautifully “knit together” a man and woman from very different backgrounds.

Creating Your Legacy

Crawford and Karen are aware that each marriage leaves a legacy, one that can be painfully destructive or wonderfully life-giving. The Loritts challenge us to think beyond our present moment of busyness. They caution us to be mindful of the long-term consequences of our marital behavior. Through the choices we make in our marriages, we create a profound impact in the lives of those around us and those who follow us.

How we need this counsel!

In our culture, marriages are sometimes trashed and replaced as if they were temporary jobs, subject to our personal whims, instead of high callings that God has placed on our lives. Marriage is God-ordained, designed to be God-reflecting and gospel-illustrating. Before we start working out the details of our marriages, we all need to consider the important legacy we are shaping.

Whether our marriages last or not, our legacies will.

When Your Spouse Isn’t Working with You

In this book, the Loritts address the husband and wife who are working together to strengthen their relationship. But what if your spouse is not working with you? What if your spouse is not helping to create a legacy of blessing?

Don’t be discouraged! You can still give your children (and a watching world) a fantastic legacy.

Even when your marriage isn’t healthy, you can be healthy as a spouse, leaning on God to meet your every need. You can give your children the legacy of a promise-keeping parent. When you honor your vows, you give others hope and even confidence that there is a promise-keeping, trustworthy God.

You give your family a wonderful legacy when you model trusting God despite difficult circumstances. What is more valuable than that? You can be living proof that God Himself is the Giver of life and joy.

You can teach your children how to handle disappointments by handing those hurts to God and allowing Him to turn ashes into beauty. What a rich legacy that is! Perhaps most importantly, you can demonstrate how to forgive. That priceless gift will bless your children and their children for the rest of their lives.

Feeding Your Marriage

The Loritts paint a broad picture of the forest, but they do not ignore the trees. They do include some practical advice for the day-by-day work of strengthening marriages. For example, they encourage us to “feed” our marriages by “making consistent, heart-nourishing deposits” in the lives of our spouses (58).  They list six specific ways to do that:

  1. Regularly read the Bible as a couple.
  2. Pray together every day.
  3. Lighten each other’s load.
  4. Identify what refreshes your spouse.
  5. Serve together.
  6. Spend regular, uninterrupted time together. … Carve out some time each evening to touch base with each other. Schedule two or three weekends a year to get away as a couple to talk and connect on a deeper level. (59)

That is an excellent list! How many of these habits do you have?

I encourage you to choose one and start practicing it this eveningIt will bless you “today … and tomorrow.”

Book Giveaway

Moody Publishers is providing a complimentary copy of Your Marriage Today … And Tomorrow. If you would like to enter the drawing to receive this book, simply leave a comment HERE by July 23. I will notify the winner on July 24, and you will receive a paperback copy in the mail.

Blessings to you!
Tami

(This article first appeared on MannaForMarriage.com.)


			

25 Questions and 2 Answers

Today, I would like to share one last peek into Juli Slattery’s new book, 25 Questions You’re Afraid to Ask about Love, Sex, and Intimacy. Last week, I discussed a couple of those questions about sex and marriage, and today I would like to look at the last two:

questions about sex and marriage

Chapter 24: How do we fight without hurting each other?

After hearing many marriage experts say that fighting is an unavoidable part of marriage, I am cheering to hear Dr. Slattery say that fighting is actually optional. Yes! It is inevitable that two different people will have two different perspectives, but fighting is optional.

That is some good news to share! There are healthy ways to work through differences without resorting to fighting.

Here are several quotes from this chapter:

Most important issues in a marriage don’t have to be resolved today. … Although it may feel like you need resolution, find your own peace in bringing the issue before the Lord before seeking peace with your spouse. (page 203)

God is teaching me that I could win every argument and still lose my marriage. That perspective helps me practice the self-control and humility required to do conflict well. (205)

Switching from a pattern of fighting … means refusing to make your spouse the enemy and being patient to wait until the right time and setting to talk the issues through in a loving manner.  (206)

You’ll get no fight from me on those points.

Chapter 25: Why wouldn’t God want me to be happy?

This kind of thinking can really trip us up, can’t it?

Here are some of Juli’s thoughts on this topic:

My friend, it requires great faith living within our fallen world to believe that honoring God with every relationship and sexual choice is worthwhile. You may be teased, mocked, and have some lonely seasons. Even then, your loving Father is for your deepest joy. (215)

The question is not about how much God loves you, but how much you love Him. … It is in loving Hm and seeking Him that you will find your greatest happiness. (215)

Yes, that’s right! God longs to love us better than we could ever love ourselves. We can trust Him.

questions about sex and marriage

Again, I recommend this very practical book by Juli Slattery.

How you live out your sexuality may seem like a personal decision, but it also tells the world what you believe about God. (214)

I have one copy of 25 Questions to give away, courtesy of Moody Publishers. If you are interested in a chance to win, simply leave a comment on this post or reply by email. You may enter the drawing more than once, but no later than November 10.

Blessings to you,
Tami

 

2 of the 25 Questions about Love & Sex

Last week, I recommended to you Juli Slattery’s new book, 25 Questions You’re Afraid to Ask about Love, Sex, and Intimacy.

Today and again next week, I want to share several of Juli’s gracious answers to those awkward questions.

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Chapter 1: What’s the big deal about sex?

I was interested to read Juli’s basic “theology” of sex. If someone does not have this foundational piece well-grounded in Biblical truth, then the other pieces may not be solid, either. However, I think Juli is right-on-track with statements such as these:

“[Y]our sexuality is inseparable from your spirituality. In fact, every sexual choice is also a spiritual choice. Sex isn’t just about sex.” (p. 16)

The “walls we build between the sexual and spiritual are only imagery.Confusion and hidden pain related to sex is intricately intertwined with our present relationship with God.” (16)

“God created sex and the covenant of marriage to be a brilliant metaphor of how deeply He knows us and longs for us to know Him.” (16)

“Sexual intimacy is a powerful picture of the gospel—of the degree of intimacy and ecstasy we are capable of having with God.” (17)

What an important understanding! Sex has physical components, obviously, but it is an immensely powerful force—for good or for evil—because of its spiritual dimension. We cannot determine whether particular sexual practices and attitudes are healthy or destructive without knowing that physical marriage parallels spiritual covenant. Unfortunately, in our culture and even in many churches, this is a completely foreign concept.

Chapter 16: How can I compete with porn?

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Click on the graphic for a great list of resources for combating porn.

I want to highlight this question because October 25-31 is WRAP week, designed to focus on the fight against pornography. Porn is a vicious destroyer of marriages, families, and everyone it touches.

Longing for intimacy and affection, many wives feel they must compete with porn. However, this is a phony set-up. Porn does not provide true intimacy and has nothing to do with affection. (By the way, the ministry that Juli Slattery now leads is called Authentic Intimacy.)

In this chapter on porn, Juli writes:

“Ironically, porn can’t even compete with itself. A man using porn doesn’t go back to the same picture or video, but always wants something new …. However, we must remember that porn is NOT intimacy; it is a cheap counterfeit. Your husbands needs more than sex; he was designed for intimacy.” (134)

Juli also provides this encouraging reminder:

“As rampant as pornography and sexual addictions have become, God is still in the business of healing.” (135)

So, how do you compete with porn? You don’t! When you discover mold in your walls, do you try to compete? Of course not. Porn is not something to compete with; it is something to fight against. It is something to resist and defeat.

Interested in a copy of 25 Questions?Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Compliments of Moody Publishers, I am able to give away one copy of 25 Questions.  If you would like a chance to receive this book, simply leave a reply to this post (or email me), and your name will be entered into the drawing. You may enter more than once.

Blessings to you!
Tami

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Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

25 Questions about Sex (and 25 Great Answers!)

Hot-off-the-presses of Moody Publishers is this new book by Dr. Juli Slattery:

25 Questions You’re Afraid to Ask about Love, Sex, and Intimacy.

25 Questions

If Juli’s name is familiar to you, you may recall that Dr. Slattery was Dr. Dobson’s cohost on Focus on the Family from 2010-2012. A clinical psychologist, Juli has been married for almost 20 years, and she is the mother of three boys.

25 Questions

25 Questions You’re Afraid to Ask is easy to read and well organized. Each chapter in this paperback book is fairly short. (The longest is only nine pages.) Written in a stand-alone style, the chapters may be read in any order. The material is very practical and certainly relevant to many. Although the book addresses women, much of the discussion would be just as applicable to men.

Do I recommend this book?

Absolutely.

I recommend 25 Questions because Juli’s counsel is solidly grounded in Scripture. We may ask the 25 questions with fear, but Juli answers them with grace and insight.

Juli treads a couple “gray areas” more tentatively than I would. Once or twice, she uses a broader brush than I would have chosen, but I agree with her conclusions. Her advice is godly, springing not only from personal experience and extensive counseling, but especially from the wisdom of Scripture.

Here are some of the questions that we’re afraid to ask:

  1. What’s the big deal about sex?
  2. Who are you to judge my sexual choices?
  3. Can I be single and sexual?
  4. Is it wrong to like sex?
  5. And I waited for this?
  6. Why do guys care so much about sex?
  7. Is ____ okay in the bedroom? (You fill in the blank!)
  8. What do my temptations say about me?
  9. How do I get past my shame?
  10. How do I know he is the one?
  11. How far is too far?
  12. Is living together a good test run for marriage?
  13. What if I’m attracted to someone else?
  14. How can I compete with porn?
  15. Can I be godly and gay?
  16. How do I rebuild trust after a betrayal?
  17. Does forgiveness mean I’ll be hurt again?
  18. What if I don’t like sex?
  19. How do I make time to make love?
  20. How do we fight without hurting each other?
  21. Why wouldn’t God want me to be happy?

Over the next couple weeks, I will be sharing a few “choice nuggets” from 25 Questions and summarizing several of Juli’s responses.

Interested in a copy?Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Compliments of Moody Publishers, I am able to give away one copy of 25 Questions.  If you would like a chance to receive this book, simply leave a reply to this post, and your name will be entered into the drawing.

There will be another chance to enter the drawing again next week.  You may enter more than once.

Blessings to you!
Tami

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Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net